O Brother Where Art Thou?

It is most likely that my drop off in blogging has gone unnoticed by the vast majority of the world. My lengthy blogs didn't exactly attract a huge throng of followers...not even a trickle, and to be truthful I didn't expect it to. I started writing the blog as a way to shape some ideas I had for a documentary called "The Human Palette". The documentary was going to explore American identity from the perspective of people of color and other minorities. I wanted to examine the ways which minorities cope with developing an identity in a country that heavily promotes a white, Christian, heterosexual standard.

i started writing the blog and soon the idea of doing a documentary film became remote. I found I was able to address a broader set of issues by just writing the blog so I decided to focus on that but to also start making videos as a way to hone my skills so that when I was really ready to make a documentary I could just jump right in and do it.

To make a long story short, let's just say that making videos has just completely overtaken my creative capacities. i wish I had discovered this passion 10 or 20 years ago. Writing a blog is a rewarding but also a lonely and solitary affair. it's just you, the computer, the research, and your own thoughts. I also tend to write blog entries that are much longer than most blogs even though I know that most people are not into long blogging. So I would write up my entry, post it, and pretty much go on to the next one. There was no give and take, there was no engagement. Sometimes I felt I was just dabbling in some form of literary masturbation.

Video had a completely different dynamic that really appealed to me. It was social, it was public, it was engaging, it was artful, and it was just simply a lot of fun. As a writer I observe
and I intellectualize. As a videographer I act, I mix, I'm in the moment (not in my head), I am constantly making choices on where I should point my lens. There is no control in video, whatever happens happens. Writing a blog I have all the control...and to be truthful it was quite boring. I needed someone or something to challenge me, that's how I grow.

Video was the perfect antidote. It was challenging because when I started my skills and equipment were very limited but there was all kinds of room for growth. I started out as just some dude showing up at events and shows with my Flip camera and posting vids on Youtube and Facebook and now over a year later I am getting requests for my video services. And that's not even the best part. The best part is that I get to engage with people. All I have to do is point the camera at someone and usually the ice is broken in an instant. I have actually made several new friends that are a direct result of making videos. I find that the majority of people are keen to play along when I'm filming. Rarely have I had anyone react negatively to me while I film them. Sometimes I ask permission, sometimes I don't. It works because I am a nobody.

I have fallen so hard for video that now it is becoming a Godzilla like beast that is taking over my life. I am fully committed. This is not a complaint mind you. I'm loving every minute of it and this boost of creativity and excitement may just save me from the abyss I have been teetering on for quite some time now. Video may have killed the radio star but it might save me.

If you are at all interested in my videos i have two Youtube accounts. This one http://www.youtube.com/user/grendelk31 which is my original account. And this one http://www.youtube.com/user/blackifilms which is a new account dedicated to black i films, the name of my film "company". I still enjoy writing so I have reaffirmed my commitment to this blog and plan to write in at least once a month. if you have been following and are still around, I thank you for your support.